A New Journey

     I would like to start by saying that I am thankful for many things in my life. I am very fortunate to have the people in my life that I do, and I am currently taking a lot of steps in the directions of my dreams. I am filled with anticipation for the future. How can this be, such a difference in outlook?      To be at the point in my life that I am has been a journey of discovery and reflection, true. But what I have found lately is that I was becoming consumed with seeing a change in my life, almost as if I was being propelled forward by some invisible force. This culminated in the realization that I had to act as if.. as the saying goes. I had to learn to hold my focus, stay positive and do what needed to be done to see my dreams come to fruition. All of this is common sense, really. But we get in our own way sometimes. I certainly do. When I consciously stopped doing this so much and opened up to the fact that I needed to apply and live by the trut...

I am today offering a poem inspired by travel, vacationing, the experience of somewhere new.                                                    Vacation               Planned in advance         finally here         time to go         off in a hasty cab         airport crowded and chaotic         nothing is on time anymore          Visions of cotton-like clouds         spread out in vastness         like mountain peaks and valleys         of white serenity          Landing is smooth, here we are          smack - stamp - whack          goes the no-smile agent   ...

Ok, so the new laptop I received at Christmas is already going to have to go in for repairs... What is with a green screen? Anyway, I kind of panicked about losing a newly started story until I realized that even if I have to start over I can prevail. I have had to start over on many things before-- not usually a story I had ten pages on -- but still ! I do not like the idea of time or energy being wasted yet I recognize the personal benefit I gained from the experience , the reflection involved, was the gift  I received from my writing and that cannot be lost. So when I get my laptop back I will take what I have handwritten and add to my story. I will utilize the library and be open to the experiences that come from going with the flow. Inspiration abounds!

I love quiet time to reflect and seem to be getting up earlier as of late, which gives me time for reflection. I have been thinking about what steps to take next in my life and am wanting clarity, assurance that what I want to do is the right thing. But isn't that the point? Every choice we make in life leads us to another, and the path is set. Maybe there is no right choice yet I must go with what feels right, what is calling me. Learning to listen to inner guidance, going within, is for me resulting in the knowledge that I must pursue that which will fulfill me, use my gifts, answer the call of my heart. I know I can no longer ignore the message I am receiving, and it is that way with us all. To heed the call of our passion is a turning towards joy. It involves many steps and obstacles. We do not take this journey alone, however. Stay the course, and you will see !

Finding it hard to continue on with my story titled " Remembering"  but I will get back to it tomorrow. I am wanting to have the story help others who have gone through what I have went through and yet I also know a lot of my battles have been of my own making. Makes me wonder why we are so hard on ourselves sometimes. Even now I count my blessings as I wish for things to be different. What happened to contentment and seeing all we have been graced with? I have overcome a lot just like everyone yet do not focus on that grand truth enough. Time to start, I think.  If I can find the words to express this in my book it will guide me to finishing it, or at least get closer. Wish me luck, and may I see the guidance that is always near!

   Today I spent a few hours in the library,  just looking at what was there for fun and also doing research. I found the sheer number of  cookbooks to be amazing, for example. I was able to see many new books that interested me and favorite books I have read before. I still remember the summer I read a particular book and how other books could not grab me the way that one did. I love to have several books that I am reading at once. Is that weird? Maybe. But I read fiction and nonfiction at the same time, so I mix it up a little. Maybe it is my way of being unusual, contrary. Or maybe it is just me, taking it all in, being me. Finally.

Today I have written 1000 words on basically what I have learned as a result of my experience having Turner's Syndrome. I am finding it hard to decide how to structure my story but it is exciting and rewarding. Loving this chance to express my heart, and all because of snow days. Go snow!